Two Reviews

Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows: Part One

Four Stars

In the penultimate film of one of the most successful movie franchises in history, the viewer is treated to a spectacular feast. There are delightful action sequences, moving visuals, intelligent writing and strong acting performances. But what really sets it apart from the previous Harry Potter films is the decision to split the final book into two parts.

The number one limitation for the last few Harry Potter films was that the story was constrained by having to encapsulate everything into two-and-a-half hours. There were periods when sequences felt rushed and the story felt as if it were flying by, as if one were skimming the pages and chapters of the books rather than reading thoroughly. Entire characters and major sequences were cut from the films, and because of this the previous couple films have lacked the completeness that this one has.

By being able to splice the seventh book into two movies, the first part could adhere to a better narrative structure that did not feel rushed. Pacing is one of the key components of a movie, and the filmmakers did not waste the opportunity given to them in this case. No sequence feels forced, rushed or dragged out. Another challenge that the filmmakers conquered was the question of where to end the movie. Without wanting to spoil anything, all I will say is that not only does the movie end at a good point, it sets up a good starting point for Part Two.


What really pulls this movie together are the themes of friendship and self-sacrifice. There is an early scene where Ron confronts Harry, who is trying to sneak off after hearing about the death of Mad-Eye. This one scene encapsulates what the movie is about, and it does not try to win you over with snazzy visuals or the allure of being in 3D. It relies simply on the heartfelt idea of friendship, and that is nice to see in an age of movies like Transformers.

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The Human Centipede: First Sequence

Negative Infinity-Bajillion Stars

Yes, I actually watched this movie. Why did I decide to pair it with Harry Potter? Because I can do what I want. In case you do not know what this movie is about, a mad German scientist has the brilliant idea of connecting three people together, mouth to butt to mouth to butt. You read that correctly. The dude connects three people together in the worst possible way.

The beginning is quite terrible: two American girls get lost on their way to a party and then do not stop complaining for about 10 minutes. At that point I could not care less what happened to them, even though I knew what they were in for. One of the keys of a good horror movie is a hero or heroine that the audience can root for. This movie definitely missed.

Then they get run into the creepy doctor's house and get drugged. Eventually he connects the two women to a stranger while a pair of cops prove to be terrible detectives. The rest of the movie is fairly boring and could not wait for it to end. I spent an hour-and-a-half of my life watching that movie. I since regret that decision.

Nor was this movie particularly scary. There was an unimpressive surgery scene but the movie seemed less to try and scare people and more to try and gross them out. Scat is not scary. It is just disgusting. But apparently the filmmaker disagrees, because he is going ahead and developing a sequel. Yes, they are making a sequel. Somehow.

Until next time, Orange Hat Guy